This morning at 5:30 I was woken up by myself to chat with me. He said to me:

“Remember, within this objective, materialistic world of black and white in which we live, it is our ideas and thoughts that deck these forms with subjective shades. It is all of us that paint these shades of colour into life, not just one or some, but all. Not just the academic, clever and creative, but also the unfortunate, sick and condemned. Our colours will mix and bleed into others causing chaotic beauty and not all colours will harmonize for art is tragic, beautiful and challenging. Try be mindful and respectful of colours that are not of your palette, believe it or not they do tell you something even if it is seemingly abstract. Life and truth is a sum total of disgustingly gorgeous shapes and colours. Open your mind, dip your brush in a colour of thought and help paint our reality with your range and choice of colours. You are an artist, armed with a unique perspective that no one has the right to deny, just as you cannot deny that of another. It is our sum total of the objective & subjective that leads us to a paradigm which pushes, pulls & challenges us but at the fringe and periphery of this solidifying paradigm is a percentage that challenges and shifts the paradigm itself in an evolutionary movement, keeping it dynamic and alive.
Right and wrong, best and worse are objective words coloured by the opinion of perspective through experience and each experience, although humanly it may be perceived objectively, is simultaneously and uniquely subjective, as is the artist who holds the palette within.
Life is not simple, happy, sad or short, nor is it’s point the attainment of a single, tiny facet (which we have conditioned ourselves to believe is happiness). Life is a collective. We should sew and connect all the various pieces which we often see as seperate and contrary into one single picture which will bring not necessarily happiness but peace and attempt to grasp it, interact with it best we can according to our capacity which is ultimately influenced and affected by everything.
We have been creating and colouring this complex Rubik’s cube of reality, individually as well as collectively that we have forgotten to also solve for it. Solve it for your own sake. Solve it for all our sakes.”

I then dissipated, leaving myself to fall back to sleep…

Meaning and respect

Life is not too short, it’s too precious.
It is exactly as long as it needs to be, we just tend to fill it with too much of the unnecessary.
The thing is though, one man’s unnecessary is another man’s necessary and who are we to say which is more meaningful than the other?

May we all find meaning and respect.

Care so much so you don’t care at all…

I think you have to care and give a shit about something (or someone) so fucking much that you believe with every fiber in your being that you can only be that which you believe and know to be, through your day-to-day life with everyday deeds, to the point that what others believe is irrelevant to your being (unless you choose for it to be) and you start not unnecessarily concerning yourself with the opinions of others, and because you know yourself so well, you allow others to be what they want to believe themselves to be, because at the end of the day they are exactly like you – so incredibly unique and different, just like everybody else who ever existed…


In memory of a sacred temple


He was a cosmic expression.

He was a temple.

He pulled teeth from his mouth as if they were sacred teachings

and planted it within the dirt inside his chest

and tried to make a garden.

For the concepts he pulled and the love he tried to push

I will forever have respect.

May we always remember the meanings behind the appearances;

and although the appearance is at peace,

may the meanings never rest.

The truth about love

He spent the night before in a drunken stupor. The pressures of life was getting too much. Every choice he made seemed in vain. He had the best intentions for everything he did, yet his decisions and actions had consequences that panned out very differently to what he envisioned.

He could still taste the alcohol on his breath as he forced himself off his couch. He caught a glimpse of the photograph that sat on the shelf. Such happy times, he thought. Funny how so much can change in several months. The photograph brought a sadness and a yearning for the past, but he shook it from his mind as he downed a glass of cold water.

Since she left he hardly cared to keep the fridge and pantry stocked. Hunger caused his stomach to ache. He hadn’t eaten properly for three days, and his binge the night before didn’t help. He brushed his teeth, changed his t-shirt and left his house.

The restaurant was small and it’s atmosphere relaxed. He sat at the table in the corner, by the window. There were a few conversations happening at surrounding tables. At a table across the modest room, there were a group of girls who sat silently, each in front of their laptop tapping at their keys. They looked foreign.

He then noticed the waitress. She was beautiful. She seemed to radiate a certain energy, which caused him to smile. His eyes moved down to his hands and rested on his wedding band. His smile slowly faded.

The waitress walked over to his table and asked if she could take his order. All of a sudden he noticed he was slightly nervous, as he pulled his gaze from his hands. Their eyes locked and he couldn’t help but smile at her, and she did the same. They shared a fraction of a second of a moment, but a moment nevertheless and he felt so certain she felt the same. She didn’t have to write down his order. She smiled as she assured him his meal wouldn’t take long and casually walked back toward the till. His gaze remained with her and although he couldn’t see her face, he hoped that she was still smiling.

A stranger all of a sudden sat down on the chair opposite him. “She is beautiful, isn’t she?”

The stranger must have been in his mid fifties. He wore a brown coat and fedora. His skin was brown and worn by the sun. His beard seemed somewhat dirty and unkept and the smell of cigarettes clung to him.

Taken by surprise, he asked if he could help the stranger and kindly said he wasn’t looking for company.

The two of you shared a moment just then. Not many people get to share moments like those too often. It’s in moments such as those when you can tell if someone was meant for you.”

He was taken aback and felt incredibly confused with the stranger, but gave the stranger enough respect as to remain silent and allow him to continue.

I know love and its different faces when I see it. I saw it just then between you and the waitress.” The stranger paused. “And I also saw it in your sadness when you looked down at your wedding band. Love has many faces and many effects and all of them should be cherished.”

He was surprised at the strangers words but couldn’t falter him. He remained silent but with more interest as he let the stranger talk.

Many have misplaced the truth about love. Do you want to know the truth about love? The truth is, there is no one person just for you. There is no one soul-mate out there for each of us, there are many and each wears a different face of love. The truth about love is, we can fall in love with anyone. Anyone we choose, we have the ability to love them. What really makes love flourish is the dedication and devotion to that one you choose. With that dedication and devotion comes sacrifice – to see their happiness over yours, which ultimately should be yours, and by investing your devotion, dedication and sacrifice makes that person you chose to love, the one. The special one, who is unlike anyone else in the world, because they have your unique love. That, my friend, is the truth about love.”

Before he could say a word the stranger stood up, tipped his fedora, took a toothpick from the table and walked out the restaurant.

He sat there perplexed at the strange encounter, of which no one else in the restaurant seemed to take notice. Just then the beautiful, radiant waitress brought him his order. He smiled more care-free now as he thanked the waitress. There was a look in her eyes that made him feel love and he wished to be able to return it.

As he ate he thought about the stranger and his words about love. The stranger didn’t necessarily say anything he did not know before, but it felt as though this arbitrary encounter with him brought a bit of clarity to his life. It didn’t make things easier, but he just felt a little more enlightened.

He shared one last more moment with the waitress as he paid for his meal. Her smile made him feel love again as he thanked her and left. The rest of the way home he thought about the stranger, the waitress, his life and of love, but three words resonated within him; dedication, devotion and sacrifice.  

Insecurities and self doubt

From time to time we all get the feeling of insecurity or self-doubt. I know feel like that every now and then, but why? Sometimes I think twice about blog posts and if I should post it. Perhaps there is a small fear of what others have to say of my thoughts and opinions, but is this not silly? Perhaps its the ego that gets bruised when it meets opposition.

So is it then the need to be accepted and respected as an individual that we all seek? A community? Some kind of support for what one does? It is ironically funny that one just needs to look at online social websites where everyone is free to comment and encouraged to do so. More often than not there is always negative feed back of a persons thoughts or opinions. Do some of us just dismiss the fact that we are all individuals on different paths of discovery in life. Where I am now does not necessarily mean that is where I am going to be in the future. We all evolve and mature. From infant, to child, teenager and to adult, our views and opinions change and evolve according to what we learn and perceive. The idea that one person has the power of another’s insecurity in their hands is quite a thought. That means, that one person has the emotional control of another person who has voiced an opinion, in their hands. The action of that person will determine the others feelings and his interactions with others, if has a significant effect. We are all connected.

So I suppose the lesson one can draw from these insecurities is to know yourself. Accept that we are forever learning and our opinions are evolving and changing. We are living a journey and to be able to discover yourself and develop self-awareness and self-realization, is probably, in my opinion, one of the most important things you can invest in, especially in the world and society we are currently living in.

Here is a brief little article I wrote about insecurities and self-doubt. Happy Thursday!

A thought on Marijuana and hemp…

image from

I came across an article a few days ago about the Oaksterdam University that was raided by the D.E.A.  Oaksterdam University is probably the only university that teaches people how to cultivate marijuana in the hopes to “legitimize the business and work to change the law to make cannabis legal”, which is their mission statement.

Oaksterdam University is situated in California, a state which legalized marijuana back 1996.  The problem is that medicinal marijuana is legal in state law, but federal law makes it illegal.  Confusing much?  Oaksterdam is not the only institution that has been raided, numerous other legal marijuana dispensaries have been shut down, causing many to lose jobs and many patients unable to receive their medication.

So much of tax payers money gets wasted on something that is less harmful than cigarettes and coffee.  I think there is a lot of misinformation on marijuana and personally I don’t think it should be made illegal.  Along with marijuana, its cousin, hemp is also made illegal.  Hemp has literally, thousands of uses.  We could harvest hemp for paper instead of forests, it can be made into plastics, paper, oils and even bio fuels.   It has so much to offer, yet people from all around the world pay taxes to “protect” themselves against this harmless plant, often with much collateral damage.    Just because something is made available doesn’t mean you have to use it.  Take responsibility for yourself and your actions, and allow others to do the same.  We get so caught up in being right and wrong that we end up projecting our beliefs onto those who see things differently to ourselves.  Can we not respect the next person enough to allow them to explore possibilities so they can arrive at their own conclusion?  We need to understand that another person’s decision and belief does not have to affect us.  If you really respect someone, you would allow them to live their life freely as long as long as they cause no harm.   Marijuana poses no threat, and if you feel it does, then stay away from it.  Just let it be.

For more information about a brief history about marijuana have a read here.